Horrifying Conversations with Mini: Kitty Academy

This conversation isn't actually horrifying. It's just typical of the randomness of living with a preschooler. 

Mini: Daddy, where's your phone? I need it.
Cap'n Coupon: Why?
Mini: I haffa send an email.
Cap'n: You can't write. Or type. Or read, so… (raises his eyebrows and looks at her)
Mini: I got it. It's fine.
Cap'n: That's my work Blackberry.
Mini: (typing) I know.
Cap'n: I need it back right now. What are you doing? You can't write!
Mini: (looks at him disparagingly) I can write cat language.
Cap'n: (looks confused, takes his phone back)
Mini: I'll get mommy's phone. (grabs my phone and begins scrolling through Facebook, randomly clicking on things)
Cap'n: Don't click on anything inappropriate!
Mini: (nods, smiles)

Cap'n: Who are you emailing?
Mini: Miss Carol. My dance teacher. My ballet shoes are too small. She needs to know.
Cap'n: You're emailing her right now?
Mini: Yah.
Cap'n: But you can't write.
Mini: I ALREADY SAID I CAN WRITE CAT LANGUAGE. CAN YOU?
Cap'n: No. I didn't go to your school.
Mini: You didn't learn it when you were little?
Cap'n: No.
Mini: (shrugs nonchalantly)  I went to Kitty Academy, so… (raises her eyebrows and looks at him)

When I heard this story I asked her if she could write something for me in cat language. She looked at me with concern, bordering on impatience. After a long sigh she said: "I guess I could... But you couldn't read it."

You win again, Mini.

By the way, here it is. It looks like string because cats love string. 

But you probably already know that because you probably went to Kitty Academy.

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