This is the year of me doing things.

You know how I said this was the year of me doing stuff? So far I have:

His scruff touched my face. Also, he's really nice
and very tall and his wife is beautiful.

• Taken ninja lessons with 5 of my friends and earned my white belt, 
• Did an ice luge shot and then rode a mechanical bull, 
• Embraced my love of inappropriate lady novels (THE LIST IS HERE AND IT'S GOT EVERYTHING)
• Went to Texas by myself to a conference and came home with several really good new friends and having briefly snuggled Jared Padelecki, 
• Wrote a second book that is wildly personal, 
• Got invited to work out w a former UFC fighter at his gym (we met at the Verizon store and we talked about his sweet fiancee and their house hunt and more on this later), 
• Mercilessly pranked my neighbors in an ongoing squirmish, and 
• I'm going to see Air Supply on Friday probably dressed in full 80's gear. 

But... there's more and I'm legit losing the very last of my shit right now. I'm supposed to be in a "Mom Squad" number at my daughter's dance recital this weekend. This dance studio is filled with literally the nicest people in the world and we've been rehearsing for a month but last week I forgot everything and now it's like I'm broken and I. Can. Not. Dance. At. All. 

Because dancing is hard and choreography is hard and coordination is hard and remembering what to do with your arms is hard and I want to quit but I can't because I am the dumbass who talked everyone into it ("This is the year we do stuff, guys!!") and now it's could be just very unfortunate for me. 

So I guess what I'm saying is that it's fun to do new things but also terrifying and being brave also means feeling totally ridiculous. 

(c) Mommyland Blogs 2013-2019

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Welcome to summer. It's feral here. And there's a squid.

The school year is over. The transition to summer has begun. For the first time in 11 years, we're not doing summer swim. This means that instead of becoming feral, schedule-less garanimals in late July - that happens now. 

One of the Rants Fam from FB drew this
and it is the most beautiful thing in the
whole entire fucking world. 

This is occurring in combination with the inexplicable mood swings, tears, and crankypants that accompany any major transition in my house. The only thing that seems to help with this is my children and their friends eating $459 worth of groceries every 3 days. 

Meanwhile, I'm trying to figure out how to work from home full time while having no discipline and a procrastination problem that if anthropomorphized would be a drunken, angry squid who likes to slap me with his slappy tentacles while also screeching Duran Duran songs off-key in my left ear. 

Oh and I have a book coming out in about a month so nothing to stress about there except being a total public failure in front of God, the internet, and everyone I know. Especially considering it's a book about kids and tech and being "screen smart" and my response to this situation is that every child in my house (currently 5) are staring at some sort of screen so I can load the dishwasher and type this. 

Just thought I'd share some realness with you in case you were feeling like you needed to compare favorably with someone who definitely does not have their shit together. You're doing better than you think and way better than me. Happy summer and I love your face today - you look well-rested and attractive.

xo, Julie

(c) Mommyland Blogs 2013-2019

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