Parents Magazine Say WHHAAAT?!

I got an email last week from Parents Magazine telling me that Rants from MommyLand was a finalist in their best blog contest, in the category of "Most Likely to Make You Laugh". First, I was confused by this and was pretty sure it was some sort of mistake. Then I read it again and I realized that not only was it legit but that there were only 5 finalists. I'm going to talk a little more about them later.

As you know, I lost the ability to feel shame about 5 years ago while projectile vomiting in the Five Guys bathroom when I was pregnant with Mini. So it's not like I would be embarrassed to beg you to vote for me.

I'm a dealer. I sell Samoas.

Hello my sweet darlings.

I just got the email that our Girl Scout cookies have arrived. THEY'RE ALMOST HERE. I realized recently (thanks to watching too many cop shows) that I'm don't sell Samoas and Thin Mints. Oh no. I'm actually a dealer. I wrote a whole post about it over at Babble.

Don't believe me? I have proof. I made a table outlining ten reasons I'm totally right.

(Click on the image if you have trouble viewing it.)

I Am Bad At Kids' Birthday Parties

A couple of months ago, I threw a party for Mini's 4th birthday. I did everything wrong. The good news is, no matter how big a disaster it was from my perspective, she loved it.  She had so much fun, in fact, that recently she's been saying things like: "I need a NEW birfday. Not in November cause dat's too long away. I need da new one to be in 14 days. Thank you."

So that's great, right? But when I tried to describe the party to my friends, they accused me of making it up. But I promise you, it all happened.